::: Tuesday, September 30, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

Coming back into my office from getting a fresh cup of hot chocolate, I happened to notice how bright the Wawatay roof looks with snow on top of it. It had been snowing on and off all morning long and it was clear at that moment. The rolling clouds are dark and there's a light spot directly overhead, making the roof look like it's glowing bright with a blue tint. It looks so surreal because all the movement was out of my view. With the human element missing my view at that moment looked like a painting.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

I deleted my photo blog. It was dead anyway... I didn't post sheet to it. I've been moving all that old stuff over here and will continue to do so.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

From the Sunday, April 14, 1994 edition of the "Washington Post". A contest was held in which readers were asked to come up with excuses to miss a day of work:

If it is all the same to you, I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today.

When I got up this morning, I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the john, but I feel good about it.

I set half the clocks in my house ahead an hour and the other half back an hour Saturday and spent 18 hours in some kind of space-time continuum loop, reliving Sunday (right up until the explosion). I was able to exit the loop only by
reversing the polarity of the power source exactly e*log(pi) clocks in the house while simultaneously rapping my dog on the snout with a rolled up Times. Accordingly, I will be in late, or early.

My stigmata's acting up.

I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Okay?

I have a rare case of 48-hour projectile leprosy, but I know we have that deadline to meet...

I am stuck in the blood pressure machine down at the Food Giant.

Yes, I seem to have contracted some attention-deficit disorder and, hey, how about them Skins, huh? So, I won't be able to, yes, could I help you? No, no, I'll be sticking with Sprint, but thank you for calling.

Constipation has made me a walking time bomb.

I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't come to work knowing my employee records may now contain false information.

The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session. He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I am startled.

The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike to the vet.

I prefer to remain an enigma.

My mother-in-law has come back as one of the Undead and we must track her to her coffin to drive a stake through her heart and give her eternal peace. One day should do it.

I can't come to work today because the EPA has determined that my house is completely surrounded by wetlands and I have to arrange for helicopter transportation.

I am converting my calendar from Julian to Gregorian.

I am extremely sensitive to a rise in the interest rates.

My wife makes more money than I do, so I have to stay at home with our sick son.

I refuse to travel to my job in the District until there is a commuter tax. I insist on paying my fair share.

I'm feeling a little disgruntled this morning. You think I should come in?

I can't come in because the deadline is Monday and so far I only have seven different fun things to do with a barrel of snot.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

* Don't drink and drive - you might hit a bump and spill it.
* Don't drink and park - accidents cause people.
* Keep America beautiful, swallow your beer cans.
* If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.
* Drive defensively, buy a tank.
* I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.
* Famous last words: Don't unplug it, it will just take a moment to fix.
* Famous last words: What happens if you touch these two wires tog--
* Famous last words: Don't worry, it's not loaded.
* Everything I need to know I got from watching Gilligan's Island.
* It doesn't matter how hard you've studied; the material won't be on the exam anyway.
* Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.
* If it doesn't fit, force it; if it breaks, it needed replacement anyway.
* Reality is a figment of your imagination.
* Life is just one of those things.
* Don't use force; use a bigger hammer.
* Make WAR, not SEX, it's safer!
* You know it's going to be a bad day when you jump out of bed and miss the floor.
* I can handle pain until it hurts.
* It's not what you say in your argument, it's how loud you say it.
* Live teddy bears are best.
* Nothing is illegal until you get caught.
* The ultimate reason is "because."
* I'm objective; I object to everything.
* You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.
* Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic.
* You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without hanging on.
* Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
* If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
* A day for firm decisions!!! Or is it??
* If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.
* I have always been crazy, but it kept me from going insane.
* Never give a sucker an even break; take everything you can from him.
* Millions of years ago, man climbed out of the slime. You want to join the party?
* Laws are like bones; they're made to be broken.
* It's only a game until you lose.
* If God had intended man to watch TV, he would have given him rabbit ears.
* Gravity is a myth, the Earth sucks.
* Fine day to work off excess energy, steal something heavy.
* If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?
* Everything is unimportant in some way.
* Life is a terminal disease.
* Your lucky color has faded.
* Overdrawn? But I still have checks left!
* Yeah, there's a lot of stress here, but I'm not straining.
* How 'bout coming up to my place for a spot of heavy breathing?
* The world's so terrible that one can only make fun of it.
* No matter where you go; you're there.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

1. The forest fire at Okanagan Lake on Aug 22. [Link] I like the way that woman's sillouette pierces the monotony of the lake ripples.
2. Jaws [Link] Has he grown a little bit?
3. God's work? [Link] This is cool, but I'm still not so sure this is authentic.
4. Rio de Janero in the shadows during sunset. [Link] Artists should create such splendor at odd times.
5. Kudos to StrangeCosmos.Com for the pix: [Link] I'll have more later!

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

A LONG LONG LONG TIME AGO... ON A CHAT SERVER FAR FAR FAR AWAY....

An online friend, crash, and I, Echelon, began discussing tattoos. (I have none.) She had been having trouble deciding about what to get for herself. Should she get something simple or should she get a really nice and complex tat, one that requires several visits to complete? She asked my advice, but all I could offer was "I dunno... get what you'll like 40 years from now." Eventually she made a choice and showed me a pic she wanted adapted and put onto her back.

It's one of Luis Royo's pieces, part of his III Millenium collection. He painted it in 1997 and is titled "Liberty III Millenium" [Link to pic] It's about 205kb and originally 12" by 17.5" I like it a lot and have read up on it a bit. I found the following caption on a page of a magazine whose title I cannot dechiper:

"Seventeen million tons of rusty dreams at the edge of the Atlantic. August 17, 2017. I have never touched other lips, but mine have gone over these rusty pieces of iron centimetre by centimetre, absorbing 17 million tons of dreams that the idiots of the late 20th century left hanging at the foot of this monument which no longer has a name."

Okay, enough art critic-talk. Guy-talk: Love the rack and blowjob lipstick. Now sensitive-talk: I love how her eye's pierce into mine and the white streak of hair. Royo was a genius.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

(now I gotta find one with North America in the eye and not Europe)



Website Reco.
Steve's Digicams Digital Photo of the Day [Link]

Self Portrait?
Should I? Leave a message on my tag board.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

in my cell enduring every bad day...
in my eyes, im on my back
to the warden, im here to stay,
oh my mind, i lose track...

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

And, I'm broke :(

I was looking through some old burned cd's, mostly backups of junk folders and found some old funny stuff. I already posted those Steven Wright quotes and I'll be periodically posting more of that junk onto here. Whenever I stop procrastinating my poor excuse for a life....

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

When any principle, law, tenet, probability, happening, circumstance, or result can in no way be directly, indirectly, empirically, or circuitously proven, derived, implied,inferred, induced, deducted, estimated, or scientifically guessed, it will always for the purpose of convenience, expediency, political advantage, material gain, or personal comfort, or any combination of the above, or none of the above, be unilaterally and unequivocally assumed, proclaimed, and adhered to as absolute truth to be undeniably, universally, immutably, and infinitely so, until such time as it becomes advantageous to assume otherwise, maybe.

(Hehehe, I like this.)

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 30, 2003 | |  

Monday at work sucked. Coworker called in sick, I was swamped and somehow I still managed to get a little more than half the people satisfied and get the ball rolling.

Here was my to-do list yesterday, as I had prioritized everything at approximately 10:30am:

Pull off miracle today.
Get everything done before NOON.

Yeah, right...

::: Monday, September 29, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 29, 2003 | |  

I got a postcard from my friend George with a picture of the entire earth. On the back he wrote, "Wish you were here!"

Went to court for a parking ticket. I pleaded insanity.

Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was the suspect.

When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.

I was arrested for scalping low numbers at the Deli. Sold 'em a 3 for 28 bucks.

Once I was arrested for walking in someone else's sleep.

I like to bring a flash light to the movies and just have all the rows move down for no reason.

I used to be a narrator for bad mimes.

Went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house.

I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. So I had to buy them again. What do batteries run on?

Why is the alphabet in that order?

Why is it a penny for your thought, but you have to put your 2 cents in? Somebody's makin' a penny.

I like to tease my plants when I water them. I like to water them with ice cubes.

I talk to myself a lot, and it bothers people because I use a megaphone.

Every once in a while I like to stick my head out the window and smile for a satellite picture.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier. I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

I went to a museum that had all the heads and arms from the statues in all the other museums.

Had trouble goin' home because I parked in a tow-away zone and when I came back the whole entire area was gone.

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

I used to work for a factory that made fire hydrants, but you couldn't park anywhere near the place.

I used to be a proofreader for a sky writing company.

Years ago, I used to work in an organic health food store in Seattle, Washington and a man walked in and asked "If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet?"

I told my girlfriend when I was going to die, because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.

Sometimes you can't hear me, because sometimes I am in parenthesis.

I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add.

I'm planning a trip to Spain so I bought an album that teaches you the language. You put the album on, you put the headphones on, you learn the language while you're sleeping. During the night the record skipped. I got up the next day, now I can only stutter in Spanish.

I lost a button hole.

I stayed up one night playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.

I have a telescope on the peep hole of my door so I can see who is at the door for 200 miles.

I have an answering machine for my phone. Now when I'm not home and someone calls me up they hear a recording of a busy signal.

I like to leave messages before the beep.

I have a map of the U.S. that's actual size. It says 1 mile = 1 mile.

I walked up to this girl in a bar and asked "Do you live around here often?"

You know when your sitting in a chair and you lean back so you're on just 2 legs and you almost fall over and at the last second you catch yourself? I feel like that all the time.

I broke a mirror in my house and I am supposed to get 7 years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me 5.

I finally went to the eye doctor and got contacts, but I only need them when I read so I got flipups.

I have the oldest typewriter in the world. It types in pencil.

I got up the other day and everything in my apartment was stolen and replaced with an exact replica.

I live in a house that is on the median strip of the highway. The only thing I don't like about it is I have to leave my driveway doing 60mph.

One night a jet flew a little too close to my house. I was walking from the living room to the kitchen and the stewardess told me to sit down.

I found an old swimming suit that I had made out of sponges. I remember one time I wore it in a pool, then I left and no one could go swimming until I came back.

In my bedroom instead of a night light, I have a search night light. It goes back & forth across the room. If I have to get up & go to the bathroom in the middle of the night I have to time it just right so I don't get caught.

I was walking my dog around the building...on the ledge.

I had a 3-year old puppy and I named him "Stay". He was really confused, I used to say, "Come here, Stay", "Come here, Stay".

One morning my girlfriend asked me if I slept well and I replied "No, I made a few mistakes."

When I was little, in my backyard we had a quicksand box. I was an only child...eventually.

One time the police stopped for speeding and said "Don't you know the speed limit is only 55 miles an hour?" I said, "I know, but I wasn't going to be out that long."

I think they should put the wrapper of a straw on the inside because that is the part you don't want to get dirty.

I like to skate on the other side of the ice.

I like to fill my tub up with water, turn the shower on and pretend like I am in a submarine that has been hit.

I hate when my foot falls asleep during the day, because that means it will be up all night.

When I get real, real bored I like to go downtown and get a good parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving.

I am having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.

When I was a baby I kept a diary. Recently I was reading, it said:
Day 1: Still tired from the move.
Day 2: Everybody talks to me like I am some kind of idiot.

Last time I went skiing I had to get up at 5:00 in the morning. I knew I couldn't do that so I slept with my skis on. When my ride came for me at 5:30 he couldn't wake me up so he carried me out of the house and strapped my skis to the roof of the car and drove right to the mountain. Seventeen (17) miles later I woke up and had a bizarre dream I was ski diving horizontally.

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now he's gone.

This morning I couldn't find my socks, so I called information.

I'm tired of calling up the movies and getting the message on what's playing so I bought the album.

Last time I was at the movies, I was thrown out for bringing my own food. My argument was the concession stand prices were outrageous. Besides I hadn't had a BBQ in a long time.

I went to the cienama. Adults for $5 and children $2.50. I said, "All right give me 2 boys and a girl."

One time I went to a drive-in, in a cab. The movie cost me $95.

I went to a place to eat that said "Breakfast Anytime". So I ordered french toast during the Rennaisance.

I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark.

I've been doing some extremely abstract paintings. No paint, no canvas. I just think about it.

I went to a museum where all the paintings were done by children. All the paintings were up on refrigerators.

The ice-cream truck in my neighborhood plays Helter Skelter.

I called a wrong phone number today. I asked, "Is Joey there?" The woman says "Yes." I said, "May I speak to him please?" She said, "No, he can't right now, he is only 2 months old. I said, "All right, I'll wait."

If you were in your vehicle traveling the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what would they do?

For a while I didn't have a car, so I drove a helicopter. I didn't have anywhere to park it so I tied a rope to it, and left it running.

There's a pizza place near where I live that only sells slices. You go by there and you see the guy throwing up little triangles.

I'm writing a book. I have all the page numbers down, now I just have to fill in the rest.

I wrote a song, but I don't know how to read music, so I don't know what it is.

When I hear a baby, I always write down the noises he makes, so later I can ask him what he meant.

First time I ever read the dictionary, I thought it was a poem about everything.

A while ago I had no electricity in my house. I had no lights, I couldn't see what I was doing. Good thing my camera had a flash.

I put tape on the mirrors in my house, so that I won't accidently walk through another dimension.

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and I almost went back in time.

I put a new engine in my car, but I didn't take the other one out. Now I can go 500 mph.

I took my headlights out and put strobe lights in. Now when I drive at night it looks like I am the only one that is moving.

I like my dental hygnetist. I think she is very pretty. So when I go to have my teeth cleaned, while I'm in the waiting room, I eat an entire box of Oreo cookies.

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

I have a large sea shell collection which I keep scattered on the beaches all over the world.

I have 2 rare photographs. One is Houdini locking his keys in his car. The other is Norman Rockwell beating up a child.

I was in a book store and saw a french looking girl. She was bi-illterate. She couldn't read in 2 languages.

I have a microwave fireplace. I can lay in front of the fire for the evening in 8 minutes.

I like the Stones. I can't beleive they're still doing it afer all the years...Fred & Barney.

I drove cross-country with a friend and we split the driving. We switched every half mile.

I just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology, the study of milkmen.

Some people think my friend George is weird because he has sideburns behind his ears. I think he is weird because he has false teeth, but he has braces on them.

Last time I went camping I accidently borrowed a circus tent.

My friend George is a radio announcer and when he walks under a bridge you can't hear him talk.

My watch is 3 hours fast and I can't fix it. So I have to move to Boston

::: Wednesday, September 24, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 24, 2003 | |  

Truly great madness can not be achieved without significant intelligence.

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 24, 2003 | |  

I'm a Libra and here's my Karma Profile (As by Astrology.Com)

(comment: I hate that first line... immediately it says I'm whipped!)

Ruled by lovely Venus, Libra is all about sweetness and romance, art and beauty, balance and charm. As the Sign of the Scales, one of Libra's great concerns is justice and equality, but this Sign may be even more concerned with partnerships. Friendships and romance feed Libra's soul; a social butterfly (and always a delightful host), Libra hardly ever finds itself without a lover. Those born under its influence truly prefer togetherness to being alone and tend to feel distinctly uncomfortable when single. They even have a hard time when they simply find themselves on their own for an evening without companionship. This marks Libra's greatest Karmic task: To stop looking to others to fill the perceived empty parts of the soul. Librans truly believe they're better off with others' constant support and companionship, and in many ways they're right: Team efforts can often get much more done than an individual, and an evening out with friends can be more fun than spending it home alone. It's the driving need for support and reassurance behind the urge for companionship, however, that is Libra's puzzle to solve.

(comment: *AAAAAAH* wrong answer... I'm a social hermit and feel fine when alone, although being single most of the time really sucks. Social butterfly? well... okay. Hmm... I could be this way because I have all the support and reassurance I need in what I'm doing.)

Librans simply haven't learned or don't trust that their souls are complete as is. They don't need to rely on others for support; they have themselves. However, they often don't realize this and instead commit lots of energy to seeking and securing others' approval. The trouble is, seeking approval can actually be considered a procrastination device. It can certainly inhibit progress if the approval sought isn't found. As a Cardinal Sign, Libra has lots of energy to start new projects and get things going, but its commitment not to proceed until everyone is working together smoothly is unrealistic and may be the very thing that stops the project completely. Libra needs to realize that not everyone can, will or even should get along all the time; when dissenting opinions make tempers flare, Libra would do well to push ahead, even if that has to happen alone.

(comment: Rely on others for approval? Now why would I need to do that?)

Differences of opinion and arguments can be very difficult for diplomatic Libra to handle. When disagreements occur, Librans tend to react in several different ways: They might become indecisive, refusing to take a stand as that would be akin to taking sides. Alternatively, some Librans will use their natural charisma to try to charm others into "good behavior." This is fine to a point. Sometimes Librans take their yen for harmony so far they're willing to lie or manipulate just to keep things running smoothly. In the end, of course, this kind of behavior rarely pays off; in fact, it may only further upset that balance that Libra is trying so hard to find. But why place so much important on balance in the first place? It's impossible to make everyone happy and one could use up a lot of energy trying, and all in vain.

(comment: Yes, I admit sometimes I'm indecisive)

Libra must learn that keeping everyone happy isn't the most important thing in life. Furthermore, others' approval is fickle and not to be counted on; Libra would do well to realize that when getting too caught up in wanting to be liked by all. Libra can learn from Aries? brash approach to life about placing less importance on outside opinion. Libra can look to emotional Cancer to learn how to confront feelings, even when they're frightening or uncomfortable. And Capricorn can teach Libra the importance and success of hard work done solo, carried over the long-term.

(comment: I should have been a Capricorn... *sigh*)

::: Tuesday, September 23, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 23, 2003 | |  

I took a weekend trip to Thunder Bay. I had a lot of fun and I feel it was a well-deserved break from work as I was getting rude to all my coworkers.

Anyway, I got to see some old friends and meet some new ones at fun and odd places (just the way I like it) But I was annoyed by a few things:
1) I don't know the bus routes anymore;(cabs are freakin exPENsive when you're going across town every time)
2) i got rained on my WAY too much;
3) and when I was staggering to my hotel from a dive bar called The Royalton (my favourite in The 'Bay) a weird gray cat followed me, stopped me and WINKED AT ME menacingly... I didn't sleep well at all... but then it could have been the alcohol.

I could tell you some bar and casino stories but that's just too expected. Okay, maybe one:
At an undisclosed bar whose only requirement of showing sobriety is that you conquer two long flights of stairs to get to the bar without killing yourself. I accepted a man's open challenge to the patrons. The challenge was to drink ten shots of various strengths and tastes. If the challenge is met, you get your beers paid by the challenger for the night otherwise you gotta pay up for the ten shots that you were supposed to drink. Everyone glanced at me when I walked in and asked "what's good tonight?" "The challenge," was the bartender's reply. I asked was it was and he explained it to me as I got the usual ribbing and name-calling that's expected from the regulars to out-of-towners.

And then I said "Free drinks for a night with an awesome start off? I'LL TRY IT!" I turned around and leaned back against the bar and surveyed everyone's surprised and gawking faces as I waited for the bartender to serve up my ten shots. I watched and listened to them as they commented on my bravery and openly wondered my stupidity. Was I going to make it through all ten without throwing up? Was I a hard drinker in disguise? Well, I've got a beer gut but I don't drink that often so I've got attributes for and against me. Even I didn't know if I was going to make it so I slapped a few tens on the counter, just in case.

The bartender asked for my name, "Dave," I told him, "Super Dave." He laughed and called me over to where he was as he lined them up in no particular order. Taking my three steps over I could just SMELL the odours emanating from the shot glasses. Some were strong, yeah... but some were weak too and I just ate a bag of chips on my way to the bar.

"And tonight's ten shot challenger is! Super Dave!" the bartender called out and everyone turned their attention to me. I leaned against the bar and looked down at the shots... there they were, ten little glasses of intoxicating fluids. Then I noticed a pail beside my feet and saw its stained bottom. Puke from past challengers, no doubt. I wondered if my bag of chips would end up in there with five or six of these shots in front of me. I lifted the first to my mouth and gulped it back slowly...

I shouldn't have done that.

I did another five or six quite quickly, having learned my lesson and took the seventh slow because I recognized it as my favourite shot: "Doctor Pepper." Then I hit the remaining glasses while everyone cheered or jeered me on. I slapped the last shot glass onto the bar and let out a *BURRRRRRP* directly at the bartender and asked for a jug of draft and a salt shaker as I was going to sit down with my cheerleaders at table number seven...

2 a.m. rolled up pretty quick while we all still had lots of beers in front of us (I took advantage of that challenge a little too much, hehe) so the owner let us stay there until around 4 a.m. (maybe 5 a.m.? It's kind of blurry) to finish up what we had, listen to music and dance a little bit before we all went our respective ways... but that's another story.

Bye for now...

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 23, 2003 | |  

So I bought a recumbant bicycle over the weekend, eh?
Now only if I can stop eating like a trash compactor.

Dammit.

I figured I'll either go 5 minutes at a time or 5 kilometres or 20 minutes or 10 kilometres or whatever.... I just need to get my fat ass on that bike often to tip my energy intake and usage balance towards a deficit. I was on the bike as I was thinking about making this post. I should do that often. Maybe even take notes or brainstorm for stuff. Yeah...

Well, my two weight loss goals are crystal clear to me: Improve eating habits and get more active. Yay me! ERRRRR... I've been stuck at this stage for almost two years now... I need to get cracking cuz I'm running out of excuses. I need to improve myself alot. I need to renew my determination and dedication because I have the goals and I have the ways. I just need to get off my fat ass and DO IT.

I hope (I HOPE) it works because I would hate to have spent all this $$$ for nothing. NO NO NO that's a defeatist's/cynic's sentiments.... I WILL do it... I AM going to peel off this flabby gut and I WILL break past all my current barriers.

Hmm... I did 200 calories for my first sitting over about 19 minutes... that's a pretty good number I believe. But I know I can do better easily... I think 40 minutes will do much well.

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 23, 2003 | |  

Damn, I'm glad all of this is web-based because my home computer is really frustrating me.
First, I was hit by a virus
Then I fought the virus
I lost to the virus.
I reinstalled my OS
I installed another OS out of curiosity
I fought with the other OS
I lost to the OS
I reinstalled my OS again.
I fought with my OS.
I lost to my OS
I started fighting with it again.
And again, dammit.
I think it's winning again.

TO BE CONTINUED....

::: Wednesday, September 17, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 17, 2003 | |  

Cinnamon - hey u ever hear about the coors beer?
Echelon - yeah?
Cinnamon - COORS LIGHT i mean
Echelon - yeah... i've drank it too.
Echelon - y?
Echelon - what's up with it?
* Echelon gets his gag reflex ready
Cinnamon - you know what it stands for?
Echelon - no.... no idea
Cinnamon - Come On Over Real Soon...Little Indian Getting Horny Tonight
Echelon - LOL

Limerick time!
A limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

My Usual Self-Questionnaire.
What's playing? Metallica's The Unknown Feeling
How am I feeling? Why? Pretty good, I've had a good day. I found my apathy! I DON'T CAAARRRRE!!!!
Website Reco? Netscape Celebrity Gallery featuring Jennifer Lopez, [Link] who's recently shed her "Afflection."

::: Tuesday, September 16, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 16, 2003 | |  

Before going to sleep while chatting online... I was hit by a virus. This is a big nasty one. My OS wouldnt start... so then I was stuck with the choice of reinstalling windows and losing all the work i've put into my computer AND all the data and programs I've accumulated over the many many months, or choose to fret and fight with the virus. In the end the virus won but I compromised it and am now able to access the data on that disk....

I'm not gonna let a virus take me hostage. Dammit.

::: Monday, September 15, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 15, 2003 | |  

Echelon's words of wisdom
1. (The slacker in me) Nothing cures insomnia like the realisation that it's time to wake up.
2. (The stoner in me) Reality is an obstacle to Hallucination
3. (The real me) The only rose without thorns is friendship.

Wal Mart Adventure (subtitle: they need higher I.Q.'s)
I walked into Wal Mart and the greeter did her job "How are you today?" she said. "Fine." said I. At the back of the store, a different greeter cornered me. "How are you today?" he said. I replied, "I feel more like I do now then I did when I got here."
I've never seen someone look so confused in my life.

Quote: However, never daunted, I will cope with adversity in my traditional manner ... sulking and nausea. - Tom K. Ryan

Q: Do you know what the death rate around here is?
A: One per person.

"Reflections on Ice-Breaking" by Ogden Nash
Candy
Is dandy
But liquor
Is quicker.

Hanson's Treatment of Time: There are never enough hours in a day, but always too many days before Saturday.
Dave's Corollorary: A very appropriate treatment of Saturdays for a Monday.

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 15, 2003 | |  

Links for the adventurous
1. headwindow [Link] Fun with flash. Some funny and some not. Try hitting "Most Popular" right away [Link] to get the best he's got to offer.
2. NativeWeb [Link] "Resources for Indigenous Cultures around the World" It has News [Link] near the top People & Places [Link] below that, Announcements [Link] below that, Resources [Link] below that and Books & Music [Link] below that! Personally, I enjoyed surfing the Resources page.
3. The EnviroLink Network [Link] "The EnviroLink Network is a non-profit organization which has been providing access to thousands of online environmental resources since 1991." Save the world! It has a whole bunch of resources by topic (agriculture, sciences, air quality, urban issues, ethics, etc) and a VERY interesting page called "Actions You Can Take" [Link]
4. Bolt.Com [Link] I had to join this place to view some pictures of well.. nevermind what I joined for, this place is truely a community with all sorts of digital knick-knacks and doo-dads. Some of it doesn't make sense to me, but then I'm not a teeny-bopper am I? No, far from it. It comes complete with a stupid pic of an unsuspecting member on the front page!
But really, it comes with all sorts of neat things: horoscopes, journals, badges (what the?), cards, freebies, tagbooks (HEY! I have one!), boards, clubs and stupid, little (but addictive) games.
5. I'm not sure what to call this, but I couldn't stop looking at it. [Link] Oh, please make it stop doing that!

My Usual Self-Questionnaire.
What's playing? Disturbed's Rise
How am I feeling? Why? Rested. I pretty much stayed as still as I could all Sunday.
Website Reco? VampFangs.Com [Link] Vampire fangs for the non-undead. To the old gallery: [Link] (They've moved, but this still works)

::: Wednesday, September 10, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 10, 2003 | |  

How do you make a cat go "Woof!" ???
Douse it in gasoline and toss it in a fire.

What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter what you call it, it ain't coming.

::: Tuesday, September 09, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 09, 2003 | |  

If you throw a New Year's Party, the worst thing that you can do would be to throw the kind of party where your guests wake up the next day, and call you to say they had a nice time. Now you'll be be expected to throw another party the next year.

What you should do is throw the kind of party where your guest wake up several days after the party day and call their lawyers to find out if they've been indicted for anything. You want your guests to be so anxious to avoid a recurrence of your party that they immediately start planning parties of their own, nearly an entire year in advance, just to prevent you from having another one ...

If your party is successful, the police will knock on your door, unless your party is very successful in which case they will lob tear gas through your living room window. As host, your job is to make sure that they don't arrest anybody. Or if they're dead set on arresting someone, your job is to make sure it isn't you...

::: Monday, September 08, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 08, 2003 | |  

I was asked on chat to go looking for a nice poem recentyl Found some nice sites. I started with the usual suspects (dot-coms) them went adventurous, looking for the hidden gems (on people's homepages) in hidden parts of the web. I won't post the urls to the poems I really liked, but here's some places I ended up:
Poems for the people - poems by the people [Link] I especially liked the Friendship Poems [Link] and the Poems on Life [Link]
Find Poetry.com [Link] I didn't spend much time here, but they have a lot of famous and modern poets. I didn't read much there, but I did spend a lot of time in their Epic section [Link] Because the one that interested me was so long.
Now this post wouldn't be complete without my favourite poetry website: Poems.com [Link] and their Daily Poem page [Link] Now, of course, there's also Poetry.com [Link] and they have their daily poem on the main page, but what they have that Poems.com doesn't have, is a section called 100 greatest poems ever written [Link] I haven't been there yet, but I have it bookmarked for later.

My Usual Self-Questionnaire.
What's playing? NonPoint's Endure
How am I feeling? Why? Solemn, because I just did a post with nine (count them) links... with a tenth below.
Website Reco? Akashi [Link] A poet blogger wish some diverse and odd tastes. His blog contains stories and a side-bar full of odd links and verse. A good read.

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 08, 2003 | |  

You've seen those bags of peanuts or assorted nuts one time or another. Anyway, I've been buying bags "Jogger's Mix" recently as part of my efforts to eat healthier and get more protein and fibre. Jogger's mix has (and this list is on the front of the bag beside the title): "Raw nuts, raisins & coconut" Not to mention the bag is clear and I can see the nuts and stuff.

Now what really made me laugh was a label on the back of the bag. Upon closer inspection this label appears to have been added after the bag was printed and filled with Jogger's mix. The labels reads as follows: MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF PEANUTS AND OTHER NUTS.

Yeah, no kidding...

::: Friday, September 05, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Friday, September 05, 2003 | |  

"A programmer is a person who passes as an exacting expert on the basis of being able to turn out, after innumerable punching, an infinite series of incomprehensive answers calculated with micrometric precisions from vague assumptions based on debatable figures taken from inconclusive documents and carried out on instruments of problematical accuracy by persons of dubious reliability and questionable mentality for the avowed purpose of annoying and confounding a hopelessly defenseless department that was unfortunate enough to ask for the information in the first place."

Two little thingies:
[One] Watson's Law: The reliability of machinery is inversely proportional to the number and significance of any persons watching it.
[Two] Lie, n.: A very poor substitute for the truth, but the only one discovered to date.

My Usual Self-Questionnaire.
What's playing? Slipknot's Everything Ends
How am I feeling? Why? Not really feeling anything, I'm tired.
Website Reco? Dreamcatcher [Link] A public web log for people to post their dreams, muse about their meaning and ask for feedback on what they might mean. I would post some of my dreams as sometimes I write down what they were in notebooks that I keep around. But... I'm afraid a psychotherapist might find and read them.. then recommend I get locked and drugged up. Call me paranoid, but you read the dream I posted here a few days ago.

::: posted by Spook at Friday, September 05, 2003 | |  

Cancel me not -- for what then shall remain?
Abscissas, some mantissas, modules, modes,
A root or two, a torus and a node:
The inverse of my verse, a null domain.

::: posted by Spook at Friday, September 05, 2003 | |  

I had order my lunch from the "new kow" and ate at work today. A coworker from my department is going back to school, yay for her. Good luck too.
Here's what my fortune said: You will enjoy good health. You will be surrounded by luxury. And my lucky numbers are: 37 23 25 40 29 10
Yeehaa!

::: Wednesday, September 03, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 03, 2003 | |  

PART 1
Mr_Death> hello dirty indian's
Mr_Death> hello smelly indian's
GuestGirl> I guess you one of us than Mr Death
Echelon> Mr_Death.. you didnt happen to see the system message on your way in did you?
Mr_Death> nope
Mr_Death> i seen no message
Echelon> this is what it says: "Welcome to K-Net Chat, please respect others here."
Echelon> get my drift?
Mr_Death> oooooh that message
GuestGirl> Yea guy respect
Mr_Death> why should i respect you for
Mr_Death> you fat loser
* Mr_Death was kicked by Echelon (this is why)
GuestGirl> LOL good one ECH
Echelon> :)
Echelon> he'll be back

PART 2
* Mr_Death () has joined #lobby
GuestGirl> sure enuff
Mr_Death> Echelon if you kick me out again, i'll call you a faget for the rest of your natural boring life
* Echelon sets mode: -v Mr_Death
* Echelon sets mode: +b Mr_Death
Echelon> you're not kicked.
Echelon> happy?

PART 3 (later on, after some swearing directed at me in private)
* Mr_Death was kicked by Echelon (good night)
Guest> har har har
Echelon> how many of you was he harassing anyway?
Guest> u mean sexual or physical?
Guest> har har har
Echelon> textual. (we're online)
Guest> *L*
Echelon> :)

::: posted by Spook at Wednesday, September 03, 2003 | |  

Woah... I had a spooky dream about Judgement Day. The planet was ravished by nukes and in the aftermath, it left a mess of people in general. People were burned, the air was always hot and the sun barely penetrated the ever-present clouds. Anarchy ruled the lands outside of protected colonies and gangs pillaged other groups of people.

In my dream, I was a protector of my people and I was alone after whatever reason I could not comprehend. And I was hunted by one of the gangs. The gangmembers were people I sometimes see around town... The fact both soothed and frightened me in my dream.

I had been part of a group and we were escorting a group of people from one protected area to another and we were ambushed as we were passing through a large building. I had lost my group, but the gang followed me and soon had me cornered in the locked foyer. Now, I think about it and I must have sent the group of people away with the other protectors and I had stayed to face the gang.

I stalked around the shadows and hunted them down, as they hunted me. I soon ran out of places to run and places to hide when they had me surrounded near the top of the staircase in the foyer. The only option I had was to jump, so I threw a grenade at the support and jumped. The explosion rocked the foyer and raised dust everywhere, but it was silent after the explosion and we all could almost hear each other breathe and step around, I chose to remain and not move.

As the dust slowly settled, I began to see silouettes of the gangmembers and shot at them, killing them. The ones I didn't see I could hear and shot them also. Soon there was just a few of them remaining after all the dust had settled. But we all had one disadvantage, the dust revealed our footsteps and sneaking around was no longer possible. I picked one set of tracks and quickly ran him down, keeping as silent as possible and also listening for noises behind me.

I continued stalking around, paying attention to the tracks in the dust but what I thought was three gangmembers who survived the grenade, turned out to be four and I didn't know where the remaining three gangmembers were. Having no luck on the main floor I once again climbed the staircase to the foyer... There the tracks were for the remaining three.

I again picked one set of tracks and followed it through corridors and rooms but came upon another large room, much like the foyer I had just left. Expecting the worst, I lobbed a grenade at the centre support of all the walkways overhead. More dust flew into the air and the walkways came down, killing one of my would-be ambushers another directly into my line of fire. I pulled the trigger and nearly cut him in half with my automatic rifle. I ducked into cover and listened for my last remaining foe.

I walked around the room, stalking him, looking for clues and listening for signs of his whereabouts. I KNEW I had seen him fall from the walkways too, but was he dead already? If so, where is his body? I can't tell yet because the dust hasn't settled yet and it's noisely outside. There's a convoy going by and I cannot tell if they're friend or foe. I hear a click and I jump for cover, a bullet misses me and hits the floor near my feet. I roll onto my back and begin shooting up at the overhead walkway, one of three that hadn't fallen, he must be up there. I riddle the underside of the walkway with bullet holes, but I cannot tell if I've hit him. All was silent again, but I wanted to be sure so I found a ladder and climbed it.

Peeking over the level, I saw my would-be killer. He was shot, bleeding, forcing his breath to be quiet and didn't know I was behind him. I looked around for traps then stepped onto the walkway. "Your group is really good at hunting people," I announced to him with my rifle aimed squarely at his head. He turned to look at me, dropped his gun off the walkway and sat down, leaning against the guardrails. I recognised him and he recognised me. We talked for a bit as his breathing got more and more shallow. We talked about how his life was reduced and what it was like outside the new colonies. I saw with him until he took his last breath and left him there...

::: Tuesday, September 02, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Tuesday, September 02, 2003 | |  

We're deep into the holiday gift-giving season, as you can tell from the fact that everywhere you look, you see jolly old St. Nick urging you to purchase things, to the point where you want to slug him right in his bowl full of jelly.

::: Monday, September 01, 2003 :::

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 01, 2003 | |  

Astronomy Picture of the Day [Link] Pictures by NASA... the day I posted this there was a gas cloud that looks like a gargoyle is flying towards me. Cool.

The Daily Motivator [Link] I had a hard time getting out from under my covers today and thought this would help, heheh.

RoRsTeR's Calvin and Hobbes comic strip of the day page [Link] I miss calvin n hobbes comix.... I love his mischievous/evil grin with his thin evil eyes and wiiiiiiiiiiiiiide understated smile. The page also has some good links at the bottom.

National Geographic's Photo of the Day [Link] Classy.... comes with a nice explanatory caption of the photo presented.

Morbid Fact of the Day [Link] It's here just because I was getting too interesting, classy and motivational... I'm striving for a twisted balance here, okay? Okay.

::: posted by Spook at Monday, September 01, 2003 | |  

Labor Day, holiday celebrated in the us and canada on the first monday in september to honor the laborer. It was inaugurated by the knights of labor in late 1800's and made a national holiday by the us congress in very late 1800's. In most other countries—and among the leftists in the us and canada—may day (may 1st) is celebrated instead. (sorry I don't remember exact dates, but 1882 and 1894 seem familiar.)

My Usual Self-Questionnaire.
What's playing? Static-X's Push It - The Memphisto Odyssey Crucified Dub Mix
How am I feeling? Why? Tired, was up late chatting last night. Had five online relationships... a new record, heehee. No, nothing happened. Plus, I find it sucks being a walking encyclopedia
Website Reco? idea a day [Link] Ideas free of copyright so you can steal them, copy them or plain old exploit them.